11 Visual Novels That Will Make You Never Want To Date Again

When we play visual novels, we get fully immersed in the game. Once it’s over, we look back and sometimes find it’s changed our perspective a little bit. These game will change what you think about dating.

1Yume Miru Kusuri: A Drug That Makes You Dream

Yume Miru Kusuri: A Drug That Makes You Dream

Sometimes we all want to walk on the wild side and explore a slightly darker side of dating. In Yume Miru Kusuri, you can hook up with 3 different girls from your school that are a lovely mix of drugs, auto-erotic asphyxiation, crazy emotions, and you may or may not murder someone as a bonding exercise. It’s like a great game of “how crazy is my girlfriend?”

After playing this, you will have a fear of discovering every potential love interest you meet is secretly insane.

2Katawa Shoujo

An incredibly heartfelt dating sim that is focused on dating girls with disabilities. You’d think someone is making a joke or a sexy fetish game, but it’s more like the Clannad of visual novels (even though Clannad is already the Clannad of visual novels…) and was created by the people of 4chan who apparently can troll you with very real, justified feels. (4CHAN MAKE MORE GAMES PLEASE!)

This emotional ride of love and loss will hit you so deep in the feels that you’ll never have feels again. Say goodbye to dating forever.

3Lucky Dog 1

Lucky Dog 1

If your favorite movie is the Goodfellas or The Godfather, you can think of this visual novel as their sequel. Convicted gangsters are planning to break out of prison but here’s the fun twist – they’re gay, alone in a cell together, and planning an escape. It’s like a big metaphor for coming out of the closet but with more sexual tension.

The characters themselves have some quirks like the main character repeatedly being told he smells like a ballsack, one of the boys is a hardcore necrophiliac, and there’s a lot of rape that will make you have to just sit down in a corner for awhile to think about life.

 

4Burn Your Fat With Me!!

This visual novel takes advantage of people’s Dating game addiction and makes them apply it to getting fit. To get dates or progress through the game you have to do sits ups and other exercises. It’s training you with “moetivation.”

After a few rounds, you will get very excited because you feel accomplished and will start talking to the game. You soon realize this is the best relationship ever.

 

5Osananajimi wa Daitouryou: My Girlfriend is the President

What if aliens made the world leaders all cute girls? What if you had the chance to make these leaders your girl? Osananajimi puts the player right in the middle of this with plenty of opportunities to become the “First Man” of many countries. I recommended trying the Russian girl route because she is basically female Vladimir Putin.

After playing with these adorable world leaders who have the planet brainwashed, normal dating will seem very boring in comparison.

6Gakuen Handsome

Gakuen Handsome

If you’ve read old school Josei and were turned on when someone had a chin longer than their face, this visual novel will rock your world. Play it for the thrilling characters who cover all the typical tropes and satire all of it… Its a perfect game for anyone who wants to see gay men with faces like a shovel get it on.

Their chins also double as swords in one infamous scene. This will instill in you a fear of accidentally getting stabbed. Welcome to the forever alone life.

7Saya no Uta

Saya no Uta

DO NOT PLAY THIS IF YOU ARE SQUEAMISH. You may feel very uncomfortable because of the discordant music, dark themes, and premise that the protagonist now sees scenery/friends/objects/everything as gore which launches him into madness overtime. The story is written by Gen Urobuchi (writer of Madoka Magica, Fate/Zero) so expect murder, cannibalism, and a slow descent into hell.

After playing this game, you will lose the will to do anything. Avoid unless you think you’re mentally invincible.

8Jurassic Heart

For the people who are into reptiles, Jurassic Heart will provide a worthwhile and quick challenge. You aim to capture the heart of a handsome dinosaur in a modern setting. Don’t be fooled by its premise, this game takes itself seriously. You can even play it right now, for free to check.

With only a few choices and very quick gratification, you will wish that all dating was this straightforward and will cry into your pillow as you set your tinder profile picture to a dinosaur.

9Hatoful Boyfriend

Sometimes people wish they could date their pet. Hateful Boyfriend is like stepping into one of these pet date fantasies and it is centered all around birds in high school. Don’t think too much just decide: which bird do you want to most date?

After playing this game you will realize you put a lot of effort into capturing the heart of a bird and you actually really enjoyed it. For the good of all species, you decide to become asexual.

 

10Eiyuu*Senki

Eiyuu*Senki

Let’s be honest, power is sexy and we’d all leap at the chance to date powerful historical figures. This visual novel is a twist on this idea with genderbent versions of Napoleon, Ceasar, and so many more. Snuggle up and take an interest in history with these ladies.

When you’re done playing, you’ll realize you can never date someone who isn’t at least a Captain in the army or a world renowned genius in art.

 

11Yandere Simulator

Yandere Simulator

This game is still in development (but you can try out the sandbox version of it for testing) and isn’t a visual novel but it’s impossible to not mention. Just from the concept and early gameplay, thousands of gamers are getting excited. You play the hidden school Yandere who just wants Senpai to notice you. So, of course, you have to eliminate other girls to make sure they don’t capture Senpai’s heart. Expect murder, cleaning up afterwards, seduction, police, and an insanity mode. We’ve already written an entire article on this game and the walkthrough videos are worth checking out.

After seeing the mountains of bodies you sacrificed to get Senpai to notice you, you may consider that dating is just too bloody so you opt to marry your pillow.

 

Waifu

 

Have visual novels ever made you think differently about dating?

Loading Disqus Comments ...
Loading Facebook Comments ...

LEAVE A REPLY

Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here